Face-off

Brigitte Macron and Queen Camilla are a study in contrasts -- in their approach to cosmetic work

The two women presented a study in contrast as they posed next to each other. The occasion was the state visit of the French President, Emmanuel Macron, to Britain. And the two ladies in question were the French First Lady, Brigitte Macron, and Camilla, the Queen of the United Kingdom. 

 

On the one hand, you had Brigitte, whose unnaturally taut face carried signs of every cosmetic procedure she had ever had. Her cheeks looked hamster-like because of filler, her forehead was immobile because of Botox, and her smile looked more like a grimace on a face that had been stretched tight as a drum. On the other hand, you had Camilla, whose every year was visible on her finely-wrinkled face, with laugh lines, frown lines, wattled neck, et al. It was clear that the only cosmetic procedure the Queen of England had ever signed up for was the beeswax facials that she relies on to keep her skin glowing.

 

But glowing she certainly was: her complexion all peaches and cream, with wrinkles that were completely age-appropriate for a woman in her late seventies. Her hair was an ash blonde so that the greys merged in and was cut in a wispy style that worked well for her angular face. And that’s before we even get to Camilla’s beautifully tailored dresses – that hit just below the knee and were cinched at the waist to draw discreet attention to her figure – that were perfectly judged for the occasion. 

 

On the contrary, Brigitte looked like a caricature of herself, all nipped and tucked, with a preposterous bouffant hairstyle (that looked suspiciously like a wig). Her outfit did her no favours either, with the skirt ending well above the knee, and the jacket cut so tight that she could barely move her arms. The silhouette may well have worked on the runway, but it looked completely inappropriate in the shadow of Windsor Castle. 

 

Looking at the two women pictured together, it was all too easy to tell which one of them was happy with the process of ageing and which one was fighting it all the way. 

 

And while I have no intention of sitting in judgement on women who want to keep the predations of age at bay with every weapon at their command, I can’t help but feel that when it comes to tweakments, after a certain point the law of diminishing returns sets in. So, when you are in your forties and fifties, a little (and very little, mind you) bit of Botox and filler goes a long way. But by the time you hit your sixties and seventies, no amount of cosmetic treatment can mask the inevitable depredations that Nature subjects all of us to as we get older.

 

Once you cross the 65-year-old mark, every tweakment instead of making you look younger, only makes you look just a little bit weird. And by the time you reach your seventies, you end up looking like a cautionary tale, just like Madame Macron did on this occasion.

 

Given a choice, I know which woman I would rather look like if I am lucky enough to get to my seventies. Yes, you’re right, it’s Camilla all the way, the Queen of ageing with grace and dignity.

 

Long Live The King!

The British royals know how to put on a show – and keep us all entertained

 

Say this for the British royal family. They know how to keep us entertained. First there was the Platinum Jubilee that provided hours of live television programming. Sadly, in a matter of months, Queen Elizabeth II was dead, but her funeral was not just an emotive occasion but a prime example of the kind of pageantry that only the Brits can pull off. And now, a few short months later, we have the coronation of King Charles III and Queen Camilla. 

 

I don’t know about you, but I sat glued to the television screen for hours, watching the spectacle unfold. How could I possibly tear myself away from the sight of golden carriages pulled by six perfectly-matched greys, endless columns of soldiers from every arm of the military, marching in perfect tandem, jewel-encrusted crowns and orbs and scepters, the kind we read about in fairy tales, and a resplendent King and Queen, processing down Westminster Abbey to rousing cries of God Save The King. The scenes were like something out of a movie, though even Hollywood wouldn’t have had the budget to stage a show of this magnitude. 

 

At the end of that marathon of TV-watching, here are just some of the thoughts that popped into my head:

 

·       When Britain claims that it is a multicultural society, it is prepared to walk the talk. At the Coronation, we saw Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, a practicing Hindu, read out a lesson from the Bible. There was a Sikh as part of the Christian choir. And while the liturgy of the ceremony was determinately Christian, at the end, when the King was leaving the Abbey, faith leaders from other communities (Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist) lined up to say their prayers for his success. 

·       The crowning of Queen Camilla was the ultimate victory of true love. There was a time – when the then Prince Charles’ marriage to Diana was imploding – when Camilla was the most hated woman in Britain. The tragic death of Diana soon after she divorced Charles forced Camilla underground for years. But here she was, crowned alongside him by the same Church that would not even allow her and Charles to marry in a religious ceremony 18 years ago (they had to tie the knot in Windsor Town Hall). As triumphs go, this one was pretty much complete.

·       It was especially refreshing to see a blended family on the balcony of Buckingham House as Camilla’s grandchildren, who had served as her pages, walked on to the balcony to stand beside her and the King, who was flanked by his own grandchildren (his eldest, George, had served as his page). In an era in which divorces and second marriages are all too common, it was nice to see royalty –usually a bastion of conservatism – embrace the concept of blended families so whole-heartedly.

 

·       The breakout star of the Coronation was the Lord President of the Privy Council, Penny Mordaunt, who was tasked with carrying a heavy sword at right angles to her body, throughout the proceedings. That she managed to do so without breaking a sweat must be down to her training as a magician’s assistant (no, I kid you not). Though, if you ask me, they missed a trick by not sawing her apart and then – abracadabra! – putting her back together on live television. Now that would have been a spectacle to beat any Coronation!