Will you be my Valentine?

Save yourself! Say no to the commercialisation of romance that is Valentine's Day

It's that time of year again. When we are exhorted to up our game when it comes to gourmet dinners, expensive gifts and mushy greeting cards. When we are asked to break out the fancy chocolate and those overblown hothouse flowers. When we are encouraged to go for the extravagant gesture that translates as excessive expense.

Yes, Valentine's Day is around the corner and suddenly we are required to see life through the rose-tinted glasses of romance. Whisk your girlfriend away for a romantic mini-break. Surprise her with a diamond. Book a band to serenade her over dinner. (Sorry guys, but this is one time when you are expected to do all the heavy lifting while your better half sits back and prepares to be pampered!)

As I may have mentioned before in these pages, there is nothing I hate more than all this palaver. It's bad enough to suggest that one day should be set aside to celebrate romance (if you ask me, given the hate we see all around us, we should celebrate love and lovers every single day.) But it's even worse to take that day and commercialise the living bejesus out of it.

And that's exactly what has happened to Valentine's Day. Schmaltzy greeting cards flood the shops in the run up to V Day. Flower shops push up their prices to absurd levels to take full advantage of young (and sometimes middle-aged) love. And restaurants ditch their regular menu to come up with Valentine Day specials that always involve such 'aphrodisiacal' ingredients as oysters and asparagus (this seems borderline insulting to me but then I've never been to one of these 'special V day' dinners, so what do I know?) paired with dodgy sparkling wine that they pass off as champagne.

Growing up when I did, I was fortunate enough to go through my teenage years without worrying about whether I would score a Valentine card of my own. There was certainly no pressure to find a date for Valentine's Day -- or be considered a loser forever. And nor was it considered mandatory to waste an enormous amount of money on this day to prove just how romantic you were.

Young people these days are not so lucky. Being home alone on Valentine's Day is likely to reduce your status to that of social pariah. But if you are going out, guys, then be prepared to shell out the big bucks to prove just how devoted a lover you are. Bring on the roses, pop the champagne, and prepare for an evening of conspicuous consumption made tolerable by some mandatory canoodling.

Speaking for myself, I can't think of anything more soul-destroying -- or romance-ruining, or even bankrupt-making -- as participating in this commercial exercise that goes by the monicker of Valentine's Day. So my way of registering a protest is to stay at home, cook a simple meal, open a bottle of wine and then settle down on the couch to watch a good movie or TV series (which, to be honest, is what I do most days).

But if you want to push the boat out on V Day, don't let me put a damper on your enthusiasm. By all means, spend a fortune on overpriced flowers, max your credit card out on buying the most expensive set meal ever, and surprise her with the stone of her choice. If you want to be a chump, then it is hardly my place to stop you.

If, on the other hand, you want to Just Say No to V day and its vanities, then here's a handy guide to what you can do instead with the money you have saved:

* You can buy a bottle of champagne -- the real thing, not all that sparkling wine nonsense -- and invite your date over to pop it open ceremonially. Drink it in the privacy of your home (or your room if you still live with your parents), pairing with a simple meal of smoked salmon, scrambled eggs and buttery toast. I am not sure if any of this stuff is 'aphrodisiacal' but I am pretty sure it will put you in the right mood.

* Book a spa break for you and your loved one over the weekend. Sleep in late, have a nice brunch, get massaged. Rinse and repeat. Bliss!

* Create a bespoke experience for your significant other. Buy the best bath products in the market and stock up on scented candles. And when she/he gets back from work, surprise her/him with a lovely bubble bath (bottle of bubbly and back scrub optional).

* Eschew cliches like jewellery and designer bags and find a present that is meaningful for your loved one. Find a first edition/signed copy of a book she adored as a child. Buy a piece of art that he admired as you walked past the art gallery. Or better still, if you are up to it, write him/her a love poem of your own, have a calligrapher copy it down, and set it in a beautiful frame.

And most important of all, don't wait for Valentine's Day to do all this stuff. Love is worth celebrating every day of the year.  And lovers, even more so.

Eat, drink and be merry

As it now turns out that coffee, chocolate and wine are actually good for you

It has long been my fantasy that science would one day discover that all the stuff that we enjoy eating and drinking – potato chips, chocolate, red wine, coffee – is good for us. And that all the stuff that we loathe – salad, low-fat dressing, green tea, and other such ‘healthy’ options – are actually bad for us. Well, this week I am happy to report that we are half-way there.

A recent study conducted by the Luxembourg Institute of Health, the University of Warwick Medical School, the University of South Australia and the University of Maine (phew! It takes a global village to bring you good news these days), found that those who ate 100 gms of chocolate a day – equivalent to a bar – had reduced insulin resistance and improved liver enzymes. And since insulin resistance is often a precursor to diabetes, which is a risk factor in cardiovascular health, having a chocolate bar could potentially be better for your health than glugging glasses of wheatgrass (that bit of extrapolation is entirely mine, not to be laid at the door of those worthy professors!).

In fact, the same study also looked at the consumption of chocolate alongside tea and coffee. Both these drinks are high in polyphenols, a substance that exists in chocolate and makes it beneficial to cardio and metabolic health. So, the best think you can do is eat your chocolate with a nice steaming cup of coffee or tea.

But don’t celebrate just yet. This is not a license to cut a generous slice of chocolate cake or even tear open a bar of Snickers at snack time. The kind of chocolate that is good for you is one that is closest to the natural product, cocoa; not the processed, sugar-heavy stuff that is stocked in your fridge. So yes to dark chocolate bars with a high cocoa content; no to milk chocolate with industrial quantities of sugar and fat added to it.

Okay, I admit, this is not ideal. But I will take it. Especially since it comes close on the heels of another bit of good news. A joint study carried out by researchers from Belgium and the Netherlands on gut bacteria concluded that diversity – in terms of having many different kinds of bacteria – was good for your gut, and hence, for your health. And one way of increasing that diversity was to drink red wine and coffee.

Red wine has always has its cheerleaders, who credit it with doing everything from reducing cholesterol to bettering cardiovascular health. It is rich in antioxidants, such as quercetin and resveratrol, which play a part in reducing the risk of cancer and heart disease. And red wine is credited with playing a major part in the famous ‘French paradox’, which refers to the fact that while the French eat more dairy and fat, their rates of heart disease are much lower than, say, those of Americans.

Red wine is also an essential element in the so-called Mediterranean diet, which is widely believed to be the healthiest way to eat and drink your way to a long and happy life. Have a glass or two (low to moderate consumption is the key; drink the way Europeans do, no British-style binge-drinking) along with a diet high in fruits, vegetables, unrefined cereals, lots of fish, very little red meat, and lots of olive oil, and you are good to go for another few decades.

But while you clearly can’t go wrong with red wine (so long as you remember to drink only a couple of glasses), coffee too has been getting good press of late. An American Diabetes Association study last year found ‘strong’ evidence that drinking six cups of coffee per day could reduce the risk of type 2 diabetes by 33 per cent for both men and women. However, the results were the same with both caffeinated and decaffeinated coffee, so it is unlikely that the magic ingredient is caffeine. But either way, I’ll take it (black and with just a splash of Stevia, thank you).

Especially since coffee seems to offer other health benefits as well. There is evidence that it increases dopamine production in the brain, which explains why you feel so good after that first cup of coffee in the morning. Studies have shown that those drinking four cups of coffee a day had an 11 per cent lower risk of heart failure. And high coffee consumption has also been linked to a lower risk of Parkinson’s, though this benefit seems to be limited to men. (Coffee? Sexist? Who knew?)

So, this Sunday morning, as I sip on my fourth cup of an Italian roast and decant a nice bottle of a light fruity red so that it is ready to drink by the time lunch is served, I send up a silent prayer. Please God, make goji berries and quinoa evil, and turn potatoes into the next super-food. And cheese. Oh yes, please don’t forget cheese!