Stay calm and carry on

Here's how I deal with stress...

 

One of the first questions that doctors ask you at a medical examination is whether you are suffering from stress. And given the pressures of modern life, rare is the person who does not answer with a resounding yes. When you do confess to feeling stressed, you are generally asked to do some light yoga or meditation, lighten your workload, develop a healthier lifestyle, and so on.

 

There’s nothing wrong with this advice, but the methods I have adopted over the last few years to deal with stress are quite different. Here, in no particular order of importance, are what they are. 

 

·       Stop fighting with strangers on the Internet. There was a time when I would respond angrily to nasty comments on social media and waste hours of my time trying to get the last world in these virtual altercations. But I am older and wiser now and no longer feed the trolls with the attention they so desperately crave. Instead of replying to rude people, I just block them and move on. My timeline is much cleaner for it, and my life far more peaceful.

·       Don’t discuss politics at family gatherings. Or in family Whatsapp groups, for that matter. No matter how sure you are of the righteousness of your position – whichever side of the political spectrum you happen to fall on – there is no way you are going to change hearts and minds through the sheer force of your arguments. Everyone’s political positions are more or less baked in; as are yours. So, there is no profit in discussing the politics of the day with the extended family. Instead, there is a world of pain if you go down that route. Far better to just talk about cricket, Netflix shows, and your last vacation. 

·       Spend time in nature. It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel energetic enough for a brisk walk in the park. Just grab a book, a couple of oranges or a bag of peanuts, and settle down on a park bench for an hour or so. Let the sun wash over you, allow the wind to blow away those thoughts clouding your mind, feast your eyes on the colourful blooms, marvel at the height of the trees, and give thanks for the miracle that is Nature. You need a daily break like this to restore balance in your life.

·       Ration your screen time. It’s not always possible during the day when you have work calls and the like. But once you’re done with dinner, put your phone away and be present in the real world. Talk to your spouse, your parents, your kids. Decompress by listening to music or reading a book. Watch your TV shows if you must, but switch them off an hour before your bedtime so that your mind has some time to quieten down.

·       Talk, talk, talk. If there is something in your life that is stressing you out, then don’t keep it bottled up inside you. Talk about it to your loved ones, whether they be friends or family. But before you do that, tell them whether you want to be heard, held, or helped. It’s astonishing how de-stressing it can be to have your needs met without any misunderstandings muddling the process.